living for others

They were three old friends, living within walking distance of each other in the Deerwood Condominiums just a short hop up Mooreland Road from Collegiate.  More often than not, Betsy Sutton, Anne Jones, and Mancha White shared the events of the day over dinner, sometimes at Mancha’s as Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy played on the television and sometimes at the Tiki-Tiki, their favorite hangout.

Over the years, a strong bond of trust, loyalty, and respect developed among the three, and it’s little wonder.  Each devoted her professional life to education.  Each cherished her family and enjoyed a large and eclectic circle of friends.  Each had a deep and long-standing connection with Collegiate.   And each loved the beach. 

After Betsy, a retired nursery school teacher and the mother of two of our graduates, passed away in March 2000, Anne and Mancha continued their nightly ritual.  Early last fall, Anne, a Collegiate icon who served for years as the receptionist in the Girls School and later the Upper School, died after a courageous battle with cancer.  Then last Thursday, Mancha, our friend and colleague, slipped peacefully into the night.

A native of Franklin, a graduate of Madison College, and an educator for 50 years, Mancha joined the Collegiate family in November 1970 as a librarian in what is now the Reed-Gumenick Library.  Though soft-spoken and humble, she quickly established a presence, and once you met her, you became her friend for life.

She was a true lady, genteel, steadfast, and selfless.  She was an excellent listener, more interested in sharing a funny story or news of your family than talking about her own activities.  She viewed her time at Collegiate not as work but as a labor of love, and her unflappable bearing served her well in a low-ceilinged building that often brimmed with bustling adolescents

“That well-manicured hand on the shoulder of a child,” said Allen Chamberlain, the head librarian.  “That’s the image of Mancha that endures.  “Students knew she cared about them.  Even when she exerted some pretty strong discipline, it was always done with a respect and lightness that young people responded to.”

Mancha always wore a smile, even in the most difficult times, and as her health became a concern in recent months, she maintained a positive attitude and always deflected the focus from herself.  Mainly, though, she was totally genuine and kind, and she meted out kindnesses quietly and without fanfare, often answering a heartfelt “thank you” with, “Y’all take good care, now,” as she waved and walked away.

Mancha dearly loved her sons Bill and John, her daughter Mancha Stanton, and their spouses, and she had a special place in her heart for her three young grandchildren.  Two years ago at Christmas, she wrote letters to each of her children that touched them deeply.  “Our family has been blessed in many ways,” she began.  Then, she told them that she had made donations in their names to Trinity United Methodist Church where she was an active member, to the Salvation Army and the American Red Cross, and to Charterhouse School, a residential home affiliated with the United Methodist Family Services and where she served as a part-time librarian for many years. 

She ended each letter with the Prayer of St. Francis which she wrote out meticulously in longhand.  Near the end are those memorable words, “For it is in giving that we receive…”  She underlined them, as if for emphasis, and appropriately so.  They were truly the essence of her life.